Originally uploaded by PackRatty McRatterson
It is easy for me to criticize my ex boyfriend, and who he used to be. Who I assume he is right now. Over the years, I have learned a lot about way things work, and what is really important. I know now that, like me, he was just doing the best he could with what he was given. I realized that a while back. Hadn't said it out loud yet because I didn't quite believe it till yesterday.
He was so terrible to me. For a long time. I am certain some of it was intentional. But- seeing these two little plastic things reminded me that at some point, he really liked me. And it's hard to explain, but it was comforting and shaming allatonce.
It's easy when you're young to always feel like you're right. You feel your emotions so deeply, and you don't realize which problems are really molehills. All you can see is the mountain your face is getting slammed into. Until much later.
When things shatter, you find little pieces of them in the carpet or in your soul for *years* after you're sure they're all gone. Some of them are sharp and cut you open. Some of them are actually kind of beautiful.